How Black Widow Should Have Ended

How Black Widow Should Have Ended

What are you doing? Are you kidding me? We’re both doing a really good job. Oh you did not shoot that gun at me! Oh yeah?! Well take this! BLLLARRGGGHHHH!! Well poop. I guess this means we’re screwed… WIDOW! WIDOW! BLACK WIDOW! AHHHHH!! Owww! I think I’ve brokenn every bone in my body. Wow. I magically landed on my feet. Are you OK? How can I help you? Take off my wrist bands. OK. You. Okay. Thank you. YELENA! She’s on the wing! What are you waiting for? This was- BLARRGGHHH NOOOOO!!! NOOOOO!!! Is this a cool way to die? What is wrong with you? Well, we did it. We took down the Red Room. Now you guys go on without me. I’ll buy you some time. Buy us some time. That’s not the way you want us to leave. Yes, it is. No, it isn’t. You want us to go so you can go and have an epicn solo pose for the camera. No, I don’t. You are such a poser. Oh, hey, look at me. I saved everyone. Watch me gaze at the enemyn swiftly approaching. Don’t be stupid. Come on. We’re leaving. Oh, fine. So we left. I was going to have one more shotn in the spotlight, but whatever. And why should you get to ben the only one in the spotlight? I was the one who made the Red Room crashn and I saved the widows before they killed you. And I also participated… Because I broke my nose and I got the widow listn and I saved Dreykov’s daughter. Come on. I thought we all knewn this was always about me. You are a lucky Taskmaster doesn’t hold a grudgen after getting blown up as a child. Grudge? No, we’re we’re good, right, girl? See, she’s not mad at all. So what are you going to do next? Well, we are going to keepn freeing Widows. And I’m going to go backn to my Avengers family. I just need a jet to get there. I have a jet! I have one. You can use my jet. Oh, you want to take me for a riden in your Batwing? Yeah. I don’t like the way this is sounding. How can I trust thisn pointy eared suit man with my daughter? She’s not your real daughter. I sort of raised hern for a brief time in her life. She’s a grown woman. I can take care of myself, Alexei.n No, no, Natasha. You should not go on joyridesn with strange boys. You’re not a father. I am just concerned. What if he has intentions? Oh I have a lot of intentions. I call them my- Batensions… This is getting awkward. Sit up, Superman.n You will get a back hunch. What? I’m not getting a hunch. Sit! Sit up. ENOUGH! if you want ton date my daughter. You must prove yourself… Bring it on. How are you doing this? BECAUSE I’M BATMAN!! Taskmaster, what is your status? I have successfully tracked the whereabouts of the packagen Yelena sent to her sister. That is my girl. How did you do that?n It’s not explained. Okay then. So what’s next? I’m going to hide in this treen and wait for Natasha to drive by with the package. And you know she’s carrying the packagen now. I hope so. Then I will shoot her car withn an exploding arrow! Ah, will that destroy the package? You would think. But no, it would just flip hern car over and cause a huge wreck. I will still have to get the package. This seems like a lot of risky behavior. If you tracked the package, then why don’tn you just go to her house and take it? Does she live in a highly populated area? No. She lives alone in the woods. Oh, my gosh, Taskmaster. What? Come on. What? Go to her housen and get the package? Oh, fine. Ah dang! Uh! What the- Hehehehe. YOINK!nEasy peasy… (Batsobbing) You wanna know my secret identity? Ugh! Are you kidding me? (continued Batsobbing)
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How Black Widow Should Have Ended

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