Memorial service for Nosicelo Mtebeni

Memorial service for Nosicelo Mtebeni

a very good morning to you all on this dark day for our institution my name is ellen rongani i’ll be your program director as we are fighting the covet pandemic in our country we are also having a second pandemic which is gender-based violence as i was pondering on the recent defense that has happened to our institution when i was a girl i used to think that love is enough we hear about love in songs we talk about love on television we read it in magazines in books but is it enough the truth is love is not always enough in a relationship everyone deserves to be safe i will be very strict on my program so if your time is up is about to end i’ll stand up as a way of showing you that you’ve got one minute so for us to start the program i’m going to ask professor ulama chingua to come and give us an opening devotion as we start this service i would like us to sing two verses from the hymn of dior saga liz yaniso if you can stand foreign [Music] is [Music] is [Music] [Music] m [Music] [Music] of grace so dear father god and invite the power of the holy spirit to lose this delivery service in the name of god for the son and holy spirit amen [Music] the kingdom come thy will be done on earth [Music] us [Music] us and lead us no tempting temptation but us from is thy kingdom thy power [Music] [Applause] foreign [Music] let me sit just to read one verse from isaiah 41 verse 10 probably specifically to the family so do not fear for i am with you do not be dismayed for i am your lord trust in the lord with your heart and lean not on your own understanding yes professor lulama we are now going to have a world of welcome introduction from mr jablos zuma the registrar of the university welcome lisa good what good morning everybody before we start i need to acknowledge the presence of the following people that are here amongst us this morning professor for the devotion that was rendered to this just a moment ago the principal and vice chancellor of the university professor saquela bechungu dr ellen drungani who is officiating as the program director this morning dr sipograsi boyan who is the deputy chairperson of our university council the honourable deputy minister of higher education and training mr buddhima namely the honourable minister um of sports recreation arts and culture in the province miss fesika and gomani um dr nambu lubizi the dean of the faculty of law at the university of water advocate andy le mini the president of the convocation at the university of forte mission tb maieva the deputy registrar also a member of the anti-gbv task team of the university of forte mr mukhaniseli noman i’m the src president dr rihanna olufsen a member of the anti-gbv test team at the university of forte reverend spogasi martini i’m representing the family professor renuka vital doctor oscar japan yarden and other members of the emt that are here least i forget we also have in our midst the mayor of matatia the town where nosfel was born and raised his name is moma lazy we also have in our midst the executive deputy mayor of buffalo city councillor helen neil may we are grateful that we you could all drop the things that you are doing and you came to share with us um this moment where we say goodbye to our beloved student that that passed on it is indeed with a very heavy heart that i stand before you here and um and and and share in this profound sense of sadness um you know the moments that we um you know are recalling and saying farewell to our student um this is indeed the most darkest period in the history and in the life of the university of forte um just a few days ago no site was amongst us was walking down the corridors of the university faculty of law was engaging fully in all the teaching and learning platforms that the university has developed for tuition over this key coverage period and now she is no more and we are gathered all up here full of grief to say farewell to her she has been a lot of things in a number of people to the loving parents she is still they are beautiful loving brilliant daughter she is still that little girl [Music] that that they knew from the from the time she took a first breath into into the world it must be very devastating for them more more than you know we are all devastated theirs is is 100 times more her future was looking bright she was a student that was finishing the law degree burning a low profile practitioner had dreams um and was going to be joined by the parents in celebrating critical milestones in achieving those those dreams and aspirations as she went on all of that was cut short we are so sad as the university of forte for this when children are born we expect as parents as adults that they will live beyond our time they are supposed to be our legacy they are not supposed to be our past we should we should they should not be our past it is unnatural that that we’re losing young people in this in this fashion if the university of forte is currently going through a really dark patch um just a few days after losing nausic fellow in this fashion we also lost another young life at the university and also conditions that i can at this point say and are not natural it’s unnatural um causes that that that led to the passing of that other young life we are really really sad particularly for the fact that all of this is happening in the month when we are supposed to be celebrating our women when the university of forte is embarking on a number of programs just to do that to honor our women and to ensure that you know they their place in our society is kept where it’s supposed to be um so this is really a a deep shock um to to to to the university i want though to appreciate all the support that we’ve been getting from the friends of the university of water we’ve gotten a number of messages of support from all over the world basically which were saying they are with us and with the um germany family these ceremony because we know that we are under the restrictions there is just a few of us in the room but there is millions of people watching it throughout the world this service is being broadcast through the social media channels it is covered by some television stations and we are appreciative of all the people that want to share the sorrow that we are in at this moment at this point i would like to pause and thank the program director for giving me a chance to say a few words thank you thank you very much reg for the words of welcome i’m now going to call upon professor tandy kama from the faculty of law to read the obituary of miss nossitello mutabeni of our children [Music] me [Music] [Applause] [Music] team the registrar mr zuma has made things very easy for me so without breaking the bottle the registrar has made things very easy for me and without breaking the protocol let me just say mollowing manta wait we are so very tense you will excuse me today is the day not to mourn but the day is to celebrate the short-lived life that life was not short-lived it was shortened as you read the brief biography of miss nostalum telling we will read the two versions both in english and process as they appear in the program i would request those who are able to rise to do so let’s start with english the obituary of nostalgia los telome tibeni was born in foss lauras in the houding province on the 13th of april in the year 1998. nostalo was not only born she pursued her studies and started her primary education eternally did a secondary school and went on to madrid to lead at too long senior secondary school in the year 2016. in the year 2017 she went on because she never wanted to die being a baby that struggled to get out of the bath water she went on to register for the bachelor of laws degree here at our prestigious university the university of forte at the iceland campus no scholar was in the process of completing her final year of study at the time of her passing most law is survived by her parents her brothers and other relatives rest in peace rest in peace i thank you let us read now because they 1998 [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] 2017 we already enjoyed is university of 14 episode is foreign you [Music] english thank you prof as you said it should be a day for celebration of the life of our beloved student daughter friend i’m just going to sing one best to just lighten the mood as prophesied this is the last time as a university to be celebrating this life [Music] [Music] i’m going now to call upon d.b mayerpa debit registrar and also dr lubis the dean of the faculty floor to read the message of condolence is [Music] [Music] good morning the university has been overwhelmed by messages of support and condolences this is deeply appreciated i will now read extras from a few of these from the minister of higher education science and innovation the minister of higher education science and innovation dr blaine zumanze is deeply saddened by the brutal killing of miss nostitelum debian the minister passes his heartfelt condolences to her family friends management and fellow students at the university of fort hair he says i denounce such barbaric and shameful acts committed against women both in our institutions of learning and in society in general our society cannot continue harboring such disgraceful people and criminals who are hell-bent on tearing the moral fiber of our society apart what is so saddening is that the suspect would even commit such a gruesome act in the month in which we mark and celebrate women’s month the minister stated that the department of higher education and training remains committed to creating a safer and caring post-school education and training environment with a concerted effort on safety and protection of all on our campuses in particular female students and staff the minister further said by working together by confronting difficult challenges and by mobilizing everyone in and around our institutions we shall create a society where everyone especially women feel safe and are safe at all times and in all places a message from university of south africa to them they may need family and the university of fort his students its leadership and the community professors mutual the chairperson of university south africa expressed her deepest condolences on behalf of all vice chancellors of the 26 universities and the entire university sector the entire university sector is in shock today as we reflect on this tragic event that resulted in the senseless killing of mr mcdevin it is incomprehensible that as we celebrate women’s month the perennial and unrelenting violence against women continues unabated the chronic and unwarranted onslaught on the women of south africa and their plight must be taken seriously by every south african a message from the ufh eastern cape alumni chapter [Applause] the ufh eastern cape alumni chapters exco is shocked and deeply saddened by the news of the untimely and unjust passing of misnome we convey our sincere condolences to the family and members of the ufh community who are affected by this inhumane act of brutality we vehemently condemn such senseless acts of violence in our society this women’s month we call upon all men to introspect seek help and stand against gender-based violence we cannot live in a society where women and children are at risk of being harmed by those who are meant to protect and value them a message from standards one against uh gender-based violence a university of fort hare association as then as one against gbv at ufh we hope and pray that nosql’s family finds strength and i miss their end our heartbreak ironically the theme for women’s month reads generation equality realizing women’s rights for an equal future yet narcissist has been denied to play the role of being part of a generation equality due to conditions in the quickening that need improvement as the university has pointed out making the neighborhood safer for all resident residents is long overdue as such estenders one we plead with the mayor and bcm to make this a reality otherwise how many of our students are going to have their right to life health security of person violated before actions that action is taken the death of one student is one too many these are dark days for all of us and what we need to do at this time is to work together to do better in terms of our fight against gender-based violence and femicide but in order to do that we also need to do some introspection as a university on how we can improve the lives of our students and staff not just when it comes to gbv but in terms of all kinds of violence currently there are many unanswered questions public relations at fought her campaigns against gbv the gbv policy effort hair tries to prevent gbv the students at fort hair unite against gbv our leaders agree we must do more to stop gvp so where are we going wrong we should ask this question on this duct day so that we can do better as a university as then as one against gbv at fort hair we undertake to work even harder in our fight against gbvf we dedicate our continued struggle to nosy trello on this sad day and while we provide comfort and support her family and friends in this dark time we will do our very best to fight against any form of gbvf in and outside of our university to prevent more murders such as this one from occurring la la land chancellor a [Music] um [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] oh [Music] thank you very much to smdb and uh dr lubys i’m now going to call upon our srsc representative to come and also give us a message of support mr president so so let me take this opportunity to greet the vc the ufh management the convocation the src and everyone who is here who has managed to sacrifice their time to come to this memorial service and most importantly let me greet the family of intellini as a parent when you receive a child as a gift from god you thank god because from that particular day you know that there is someone who’s going to change the situation which you are faced with from back home that you are faced with as a family when a child is growing up the parents seek to guide and monitor the child’s growth so that the child can grow up to be an adult a responsible adult a child that will benefit mostly the society and also the family is all as our parents you always pray for us to be better people we pray for us to be protected from all the evil things that are affecting our generation and most important and most importantly you pray to god for our protection as we are living in a dangerous world that is full of vultures and evil spirits as children we always pray to god that he must keep you safe as our parents and protect you from all the illnesses that some of them are aligned with the illnesses that come with age as your children we have this little prayer this short little prayer that we we usually say god please keep my parents so that they can see my success and enjoy the fruits of their hard work as a student she also had this short powerful prayer um is a student she also helped this prayer in this particular year she was starting to have hope that this prayer will be realized as she was doing her final year in law music fellow had dreams like any other student that is enrolled in any institution of higher learning and part of her dreams was to change the conditions injustices of this cruel world and to better the livelihood of a family i believe that like any other students wanted to make you proud hence she ensured that she excelled academically as she was now doing her finale and she was about to go in the working place to fulfill all the dreams and aspirations of a family it is unfortunate that there are four the aforementioned aspirations are not going to be realized because of aluta the arrival of aluta into it to know stella’s life did not come as a blessing but it came as a curse as he ensured that all the aspirations that nostralo and her family had will not be accomplished in this country we are faced with the pandemic not the covet 19 but the pandemic which is the gbv gender-based violence we are in a country women are killing women day in day out and this pandemic needs to be fought with from all angles and from all from all angles and in all forms the pandemic is not accepted in our society we are living in a society where men are no longer treating women as their sisters when men are no longer attracting women as their mothers but instead they see them as objects i believe that if we can if we can all unite as a society and fight this pandemic we can be able to defeat it i would like to call upon each and every one in this memorial service to fight the gender-based violence in all forms we must do this for nostalo and for all the other fallen souls nostralo was gruesomely killed in the name of love my daughter lando ekala is our penis what was it foreign on behalf of the src i would like to plead with everyone to pray for the university of forte to pray for us as students who are enrolled at the university there is a dark cloud that is hanging and lacking in our institution a dark cloud that we have tried to light away with candles and prayers like the previous candlelight services that we’ve had foreign my [Music] is diablo thank you very much mr president for those message of support i remember last week when we were inaugurating the new src i did a one-minute talk with db as the chairperson of the gender-based violence task team and i was just briefing here you know on the strides we have made you know in establishing the gbv unit and she just said to me you know what i i love the idea of the unit being established but i would want a day when we don’t even need that unit because we don’t want any case of gbv so my question again also i want to repeat that what are we doing wrong because as a university we are trying to make sure that our environment is safe for everyone i’m now going to call upon the convocation president advocate andy lemini to come and also give us some few words of support [Music] [Music] is to the deputy chair of the council my colleague dr koyan the vice chancellor of the university of forte zebula the deputy minister puti manamela the src is led by the president the emission of sport arts and culture in the province them tibetan family distinguished guests ladies and gentlemen allow me to express my deepest gratitude we have lost a student who was soon going to be a member of the forte alumni the message of the convocation today is clear that the spirit of nostello shall never die while we leave we are here today to hand back to you the massive family the living spirit of nostalgia it is true program director that as the country is battling to control an unprecedented stigma that has caused our country to stigmatize the coronavirus were also faced with another pandemic that has anointed itself as a shame of the nation the gender-based violence minister as government makes it compulsory and mandatory that when people walk in the street or they’re in any public area they must wear a mask i think his parents also must make it mandatory and compulsory that any killed child when you meet a man in the street who is smiling at you who looks at you who is well dressed with smelling nice who says i love you you must look at him and say you probably my potential killer dr lobisi probably as a man i should keep quiet because all men are keeping quiet about gender-based violence but the lawyer in me refuses to keep quiet i foresee that once upon time will be faced or we are going to face the highest courts of history that all men in the country have failed to act positively while we’re the moral duty to do so and those who are legal minds understand a crime of failure to act it is not enough as a man that we are going to say it is not all of us who are doing this it is not enough as a man to stand up what you say but it was not me it is not enough as a man to stand up and say not in my name that idiom has long expired we must stand up and become drivers of change in our own little spaces that is the message that we are bringing as convocation a vice chancellor in our meeting yesterday as convocation with all the chapters across the country and in the side deck we took the following decision and the same decision we have communicated to the family that for the duration of our time in the next four years we want to adopt nostalo’s family and provide the support that is needed from the meeting of yesterday till to date amongst ourselves as executive of convocation who have made contributions to the tune of 150 000 from ourselves and we’ve appointed individuals who are going to run and make sure that we fundraise through the forte foundation and will make sure that it is done with dignity we have appointed doctor class vice chancellor who have appointed doctor mawisa mr m tez abuja as well as mr mukabe to run and make sure that we fundraise enough money to support the family for the duration of our time it will be done through the needs analysis and in consultation with the family we are vice chancellor also planning to approach the university with regards to the legacy project that will be named after nostral we know that the university is always welcoming of good ideas and even in this one will not be an exception in closing i want to say a man of power is feared a man of wealth is envied a man of genius is admired but only you of character you are trusted i’m making a call to all men in south africa today to accept the challenge and become a man of character we are saying as convocation the spirit of nostello shall never die while we leave and we’re here today to hand back the living spirit of nostello la language thank you very much thank you advocate mini i’m not going to call upon dr rihanna olesvan the member of the task team for the gbv policy implementation for the university thank you i’d like to say thank you for giving us this opportunity and our deepest condolences to the family i stand before you today as a member of the ufh policy gbv policy implementation task team in our universities policy we commit ourselves to fight against gbv and femicide and this is admirable and our policy is a good one but a policy is not enough a policy has to translate to real benefits and must result in effective measures to address gbv that plagues not only our university but our country this is not a time to point fingers this is also not a time to deny accountability but to do some serious introspection on how we can do better we need to be more proactive do more awareness and educational campaigns organize more training to our staff and our students and the broader community we need to do everything possible to combat gbv with the input from forte management students and staff as well as local provincial and national government there is a problem in our society not just with gbv and famous side but with violence in general this violence is most often perpetrated by men to eradicate toxic masculinity we must rethink rework and re-imagine our society we have to imagine a world where masculinity is nurturing where masculinity is kind where masculinity is caring we have to interrogate our socially accepted roles and our culture our institutional culture as well as our culture as south africans men are high-risk category for suicide and mental health issues and this should cause us concern could it be that the current norms of masculinity are in fact harming men and women because as a result they harm women men are expected never to show weakness or show their emotions men are not supposed to cry boys don’t cry poor mental health worsens gbv and we have even more reason to start working on ways in which we can and ought to support everyone’s mental health in addressing gbv we need to focus on mental health support covert 19 has forced everyone to make massive changes and this is confirmed that it is possible to make drastic changes in order to deal with a challenge and thus it is also possible to make drastic changes in order to deal with the pandemic of gender-based violence as a task team we pledge that we will work harder so that the objectives of the gbv policy becomes a platform for real change and thereby to ensure that fort hee takes the lead in the fight against gender-based violence not only in our university but in the broader community so that these kinds of tragedies do not happen anymore thank you thank you very much uh dr rihanna i’m now going to call upon the dean of the facade of law doctor lubis bisana over to you doc yes [Music] deputy minister of higher education purdue manamela mec sports education and arts and culture with professor gangman the mayor the deputy mayor of buffalo city councilor helen helen neil may the deputy chairperson of university council doctor shepard the vice chancellor and the leadership of the university of waterloo the entire university community of water and also the entire country let me look at this site to the family of nosferatu thank you so much dada and mama for coming here and be with us in this day we are deeply sorry we are deeply sorry we are in pain just like you i stand here today as a mother to nostalo as a mother to the entire faculty of law and i would like us to remember her as our student and for who she was the murder of nostalgia was gruesome and it is extremely sad that it happens during this month this women’s month we are certain by the continued acts of gender-based violence including femicide in south africa we always talk about our constitutional rights but we are being abused we are murdered we are raped now it’s raises something in my head are these rights been protected enough can i claim my right to dignity not as yet when we are being abused murdered and raped when we walk in our streets of alice king brianstown to our villages of hello iceland johannesburg all over in our country we don’t feel safe as women of this country now nostalgia is gone and she will remain in our in our memories what i would like to say she left us with a task we have a responsibility as lawyers of this country as community leaders as leadership in higher education sector as students leaders to be at the forefront on the fight against gender-based violence let us join hands and create a safer environment for every woman in our country let us refuse to be victims of abuse and gender-based violence let us refuse to be the weak links in the enjoyment of our rights let us refuse to be treated with less status as equal citizens of our country law students i’m coming to you you went in class same class with narcissism you share the same residence with nausea and i know it very well it is difficult for all of you but i want you i want to encourage you to come forward and condemn the public acts of gender-based viral violence i want you to ensure that no woman or man is abused in front of you i want you to promise me that you will say no to acts of domestic violence in the name of noscola not again not again and not again my dear ladies nostalgia’s departure affected all of us and now it is the time to leave our comfort zones and stand up for one another let us protect each other we need each other um when you are there alone you are vulnerable anything can happen to you but when you are with others you feel safe it is happening and it is true let’s open our hearts and say it loud no to gender-based violence we need to sing a song that’s used to be sent by our own mothers if you can remember when you were still young those of my own age you will be sent sent to go and fetch something at the neighborhood by your mother the only thing your mother will do will open up the door at night and say to you they are born they will open it up and as you move into you will say to god there’s nothing that will happen to you they’re born i want us as women of this country to sing that song so that everyone closer to us everyone far away can be confident to gain the confidence because he knows and she knows that there is somebody who is saying diaco bonna diablo bona bona martin’s tatum tv not only you who has been robbed of a daughter but i want you to know that the entire nation has been robbed of a judge of a constitutional court the highest court in the world in the kind of our country no study like any other girl of her age had dreams you shared that with us that your daughter had dreams but today you are here to witness that the passing of your daughter has brought our country together you are not alone you are with us no still will remain in our hearts forever m foreign [Music] is and goes thank you very much dr lubis for me it’s about the men i think you are friends with the perpetrators your relatives with those perpetrators as i was walking in the streets of social media whenever there is violence against women you hear some men saying what did she do as if anything justifies violence kwaney lemade it’s your responsibility to stop this i’m now going to call upon the vice chancellor and principal of the university of fortier professor sarkela buchung to address the congregation offered to you profile thank you thank you very much um doctor and good good morning everyone it’s uh i’m not gonna speak today this is an opportunity for others to speak and also apologize for not going through the usual greetings i’ve had occasions to greet everyone apologies for that i’m not going to speak today because it’s an opportunity for others to speak for those people whose names are on the programs to speak for those people who are watching this thing in the media to speak it’s not for me i’ve had my own time i’ve been speaking to tv and media and so on this is not about me we’ve done what we can do let me begin by thanking everyone for making it at very very short notice very short notice but something of this nature obviously is something that calls for for that but people drop what they’re doing and come in and be here and so once again i really really love to to to thank everyone deputy minister buddha manamela thank you very much for making time thank you very much for making the time on behalf of the province um deputy mayor neil may thank you very much for making the time and of course us dr koyana we led by you by the council of the university i will not my colleagues the staff and the students they know i’m not going to go through the usual greetings it binds us very very briefly to say that this is an unusual moment it’s not about us as i say it’s about no still it’s about her and my appeal for this moment and the funeral is not gonna be i believe it’s gonna it’s gonna be not this weekend so it’s gonna be a few few days more my appeal is simple let’s step back from ourselves it’s not about you it’s not about me this is about this child next to her it’s about that family step back step back it’s not about you it’s about them we need and we should give nositelo a dignified send-off even those of us who are not going to be able to go to the funeral let’s keep it dignified all the way let’s keep it dignified in terms of what we post on social media in terms of what we say when the temptation is irresistible and those television cameras and microphones are in front of you resist the temptation when that camera phone of yours you stay resist the temptation when people share those pictures resist the temptation we are still despite all of this we’re still human beings and we want to pull ourselves back from the edge let’s pull ourselves back because if we don’t if we allow that camera phone to just press share share share that takes us down a slippery slope beyond what is human and below what is human reverend jingle and glib funds lengthy funny cleansing i’m going to come to that and i’m going to say for once this is something that has come up many times over at 14. students yeah for some thunders you know what this year let’s do it whether it’s the christian faith or other faiths or traditional religions and so on and let’s do something let’s do it but and i’m going to come to the bathroom so this is about nostalgia i like dr b this one take take home from the take home line for me is that we’ve been robbed of a future constitutional court judge here there’s a child who came in 2017 the same way the same year that i started entered through the foundation program deputy minister and was going to finish the degree in regulation time was going to finish the degree in regulation time and she was going to join the ranks of eminent foterians in the legal fraternity eminent and i don’t need to say anymore they’re all over the place they’re leading the leading society she’s going to be joining that very select section of our society it said the the issue really and i know it’s very very easy when when their hearts are so so when the wound is so raw and so deep it’s very easy for us to focus here it’s very easy for us to to find to try and define find the answers within a meter of where we sit the i foretell does not care or if if only this and if only that i’m saying park all of that the picture this is big this is much bigger and i want to isolate two things now i hope this gets taken in the spirit in which it is said one of being constructive we can have the cleanest the most powerful gender-based or under gbv policy at fort here and we can have the most efficient anti-gbv unit which dr olsen has spoken about and i agree those are the steps and we are well on track we can have the best but we are not an island we’re not an island the issue is this and then let’s name it and again i’m saying this in the most constructive with the most incon constructive intention because i’ve said we now need a new kind of partnership we can’t we it’s not going to be for 40 alone it’s not going to be for fort here with our line department the department of higher education and training alone no we need a broad-based partnership now but before we do let’s name the problem let’s name the problem the first part of the problem has been named by speakers here is gender-based violence it’s a social system and social structures that are age old kind of age-old social structures that make make it acceptable for men to dominate for men to use violence to do all of these things so the law must take its its own course and follow up the perpetrator but no amount of big insults at him are going to resolve the problem if the court sends them away for 15 years 30 years whatever the problem is going to remain gbv let’s not lose sight let’s keep focus that’s that’s the issue so basically partnerships partnership is partnerships oriented towards that bigger issue and it’s got layers it’s got layers and people buy into it in different it gets reproduced in different ways all the time all the time yeah and social media is worse it reproduces these things those kind of jokes that people kind of spread about very easily very casually that is gbv being reproduced that is it it’s that joke that people throw about this about men of this about women that’s the first part though that’s the first part of the problem the second part is where we are where we are as i said the problem is not just inside it’s also outside let’s face it for as long as we have a quick knee for as long as in east london in the southern north for as long as we have a sunny side in pretoria for as long as we have a hill brow in johannesburg and that can go on and on and on this day we’re going to have repeats of these things we’re going to have repeats of these things and in gogo and cell and authorities name don don so okay it’s our role let’s confront that problem let’s name it the issue is southern mood a hill brown a sun is signed plus plus plus those that is a metaphor for bigger things for drugs and for drug dens for all sorts of other things those those are the things that we’re dealing with these families they send their children here there’s nothing they can do to protect their children there’s nothing we can do let’s deal with that problem outside no amount of insult against this or that individual these are not individual issues they are social issues and social structures that’s the issue but for as long as we don’t grasp that this is a logarithmic way one how long was quite a limp the time for quantity limba is up now at the time like one speaker said here for finger pointing is out the thing now is let’s sit down we’ve started with we are setting the ball rolling in a positive way the deputy vice chancellor for institutional support dr faridin is or will be writing a letter to buffalo city to meet and talk and talk in the constructor how do we move forward next you know how do we move forward in iceland we’ve got about seven thousand students here this campus seven thousand students and it’s these things the answer the nsaid as i move to to conclude uh program director i just want to underline that for this question of these partnerships for change let’s change society in a real way in a meaningful way we this thing caught us it blindsided us in a way we had embarked on a program to focus attention on women’s month we had done that but also even that is part of a bigger project we say we are renewing this university 20 20 20 30. that’s what we’re doing we’re doing all sorts of things we’re trying to energize we’re trying to reclaim the legacy of this 105 year institution that’s what we’re doing and so just then this thing happens this thing happens it sets a it says it sets us back in that sense because egbv or rather the fight against cbv is part of that renewal so yes it’s tragic for us it’s said it’s something that we we don’t like before i talk about my final point there is and i need to say this because it’s out in the media as if this gruesome murder was not sufficient we heard about this on thursday two days later on saturday at 11 30 another young person died whether he was pushed whether he jumped but the fact of the matter is that the person fell off the 12th floor of a residence that released here in town and died the complex matter it found us already kind of at the very advanced stage of preparing for this so that’s another thing again we need to ask deep questions there the dean of students of the university is engaged in processes of engaging with that family and thinking of ways of remembering that other young life it’s a different process and we’re very much on top of it there’s a delegation that’s going out after this led by the dean of students to continue because we’re already in touch to continue engagement because the funeral might happen sooner than that of muslim we have many people have spoken advocate many your comments and the activities of alumni of the university coming to the party are noted and the most welcome and i think many others the many other initiatives and i will not spell them out here except to say one of the one of the initiatives is that the chancellor of the university advocate dominican cerveza called me to arrange a delegation by a team of high-powered advocates who are part of a group called papasa they are visiting the university next week to engage with us but most importantly to have a much closer session or set of sessions with the law faculty dr luisi and with law students once again to talk to them during this time and you’ll remember that the advocates is the the chancellor of the university as well as i conclude then the the we have decided to memorialize nostello in many ways and and and and let a thousand flowers bloom we’re not regulating controlling that let people do it let them do it with dignity and sensitivity what we’ve done what we had done as part of women’s month we had decided to honor and recognize eminent women for tyrion’s on a mural in alice this was something that was happening anyway and that process was happening and then when this happened we then said with these eminent women that we’re honoring graduates from 2016 to now we chose three we will then add a fourth panel to that mural with the face of nostrello i think it’s going to be this picture here it is this picture here it will be unveiled tomorrow it’s done already it’s done fully and only by our fine arts students senior students and postgrad students i was at the site yesterday it is so touching it’s one of those if we knew what if we everything was up to us we could have done it so that it’s hap it happens here and now but that’s a different story so we will do that and the various other initiatives were thinking about i’m not going to talk about the support to the family that’s something private it’s not something for memorial services but the university has been working with the family with with the with the family but then as i begin to make my appreciation and words of thanks first of all let me start with the south african police services i don’t know if they in the room here south african police services they really really and brigadier um really a word of appreciation of the kind of cooperation that we need especially around this about the logistics about informing us about updating us and about linking us up with others so thank you very much to to that but also then and the various people i don’t know where to start so this is in no particular sequence our dean of students mr lufuna who started on the fifth first of july in the job and was thrust straight to the forefront of this and has been working with multiple parties with the src this side with the family this side with the sap has assigned and so on he really is is i’m not even sure he’s in the room because he’s doing all the things and so on but the dean of students has staff there and i i just need to acknowledge them all and i will not name them name them individually but all of them have come to the party in a big way whether it’s the residence office whether it’s the counseling unit and all of that all the kind of things that we kind of put in uh put put in place when the tragedy befell us uh that they’ve happened from that department of student affairs once again uh uh thank you to all the staff there and of course there are other people to to thank in the university the department the communications department and advancement who are also responsible for organizing this event uh including the technical people who make sure that this thing is live streaming and thank you very much to them and the one other person uh all the management people have been involved but doctor doctor here then has been kind of at the forefront as well working and supporting the dean and thank you very much once again doctor bisi dr bc when i hit the thing i picked up the phone and i don’t know what she was doing i said drop i normally don’t talk like that to people but i said whatever it is that you’re doing drop it get into your car and get yourself too quickly now and i give you 15 minutes and i think she was there in 13 minutes thank you very much dr busy there are many many other people that we should we would like to thank would like to thank the clergy uh referencing always always it’s not the first time we always at this with the rest of the clergy and once again we’re very appreciative and there are many other people who have sent in messages and who have sent in whatsapps who have sent in many others the messages that are being read here are just the tip of the iceberg the what’s ups that we’re going to collate and compile you know there’s tons of them there many of them so once again we’d like to thank everyone and and most importantly most importantly to thank the family for the patience for the strength and the resilience that they’ve shown in the time that that they’ve been here we said last night we had a private moment where we we spoke about this i cannot even begin to imagine how they feel right now but she belongs to the country now she belongs to the world and i said people will do all sorts of things people will use it for 200 pictures this is status pictures yes she’ll be on many many her face will be there her face will be on our mural her face will be on tv she in death tragic gruesome as it is she is now the star in a different way because she’s the person who’s now saying to us do something foreign thank you very much uh professor bohongo for the words of comfort he embassies that this problem needs to be resolved as a society in oneness as our motto at fortier we say together in excellence it means that all of us we need to take part to fight this i’m now going to call upon the deputy chairperson of the investor fortier council dr spoca squana to address us over to human what i must learn prof is that when you say i won’t talk i won’t say anything i must allow for a good 20 minutes i took off my mask thinking that prof won’t talk and then i had to sit there with no mouse for 20 minutes on behalf of council i extend my sincerest greetings to the deputy minister of higher education mr manamela to all the present senior government officials of our province to the reverend sepulchers martini the vice chancellor of the university prof senior executives of the university and to all our esteemed guests staff and students who have come to pay their last respects to the late miz de beni the council of the university is shocked and deeply saddened by this gruesome medal of nocitelo council together with the whole university family mourns the death of nositelo and we express our heartfelt condolences to them tevine family may they find comfort and healing through our prayers and support alomas okay welcome to my council strongly condemns all acts of violence against women and assures students and staff that will work with all stakeholders to ensure the implementation of the university’s gender equality policies to increase campus safety and to make sure that justice is carried out council is very encouraged that the university management has already started collaborating with the south african police services and the buffalo city municipality to force them to commit to tackling the urban decay and overall concerns regarding safety in east london i will not revisit the annual statistics on how many women are murdered by men in south africa or how our country ranks amongst those with the highest number of men who murder women gpv is a human rights violation this crime has a long history from the whole world from ancient times however modern societies have the means the technologies and the capabilities to end this crime so everything must be done to fight from all fronts and ended in our lifetime so i’d like to take this moment instead to talk about critical things we can do to help implement some solutions last year the president declared this our second pandemic we know this because this violence against women is pervasive it affects women of every class age sexuality race ability religion or other background all of us know that the main driver of gbv is gender inequality which operates on many levels from social and cultural norms to economic and structural injustices this means that we all have to roll our sleeves and be practical in how we move forward to eradicate gbv let me frame my suggestions by making a direct address to president ramaphosa i was fortunate to have dinner with him at a fundraising event for the ramakosa foundation in 2017 when i asked him how exactly he was going to end the murder of women he looked me in the eye and promised that when he became president he would make sure that each and every government department develops a program against gender-based violence so we are therefore challenging him and his ministers to treat this pandemic with the rigor and agency it deserves we applaud the government for its proactiveness its responsiveness and energy in fighting the covet-19 pandemic we need that same kind of commitment responsiveness and capability that the government has demonstrated against covert 19 replicated in this war against gbv the minister of health his deputy and support entities in the health cluster are on tv every friday giving us detailed weekly progress reports on the government war against covet so if indeed the president accepts that the harming raping and killing of people because of the agenda is our second pandemic then we definitely need to hear such detailed weekly reports on tv from the government’s gbv cluster telling us what each department has done the provincial breakdown where the sexual offenses courts are located and how much personnel they have how many perpetrators have been arrested how many have been convicted how many victims have received shelter and counselling and so on in the same way that the government has developed an app to notify us if we’re in close proximity to someone who is covered positive similarly the government must maximize the use of the government chip app and other technologies to victims who must report cases hotspots and to track the goings on in their communities mr president south africa must adopt a strategy of zero tolerance against gbv having said that it is the duty of each and every one of us as south africans to help solve the problems it is not the government that murders men and women because of their gender it is people like you and me to exploit both our cultures and the weaknesses in the government’s delivery of protection and other services to destroy those we consider weaker than us each citizen is thus obliged to be purposeful in helping our government and civil organizations that are committed to ending gpv however the reality is we often feel overwhelmed we feel powerless in the face of these atrocities what can we do we ask ourselves for starters the family structures and our homes are a good place to teach our youth about gender equality this is where we must teach our sons how to treat their intimate partners secondly we can speak out and report cases as much as possible thirdly we can put our money where our heart is by giving and donating money and skills to ngos which focus on fighting gbv these organizations help orientate and mentor young men they provide women shelter from abuse and give them skills they can use to participate in the economy more actively and so we ought to support them every rent counts if they are to grow and impact change more effectively and more efficiently and this last suggestion is directed solely at men it is premised on the fact that the economic inclusion of women is critical to their independence and self-reliance and thus necessary to decrease their vulnerability to violence therefore if you are a man and you are a leader in your family you are a leader in your community or congregation if you are a teacher or a principal in a school if you are a soccer or other sports coach if you are the village chief the ceo of the company the director of the organization if you are a manager or assistant incumbent in any setting what are you as a man doing to engage those under your care about how to end gbv how are you upstealing women how are you supporting women-owned businesses what bursaries are you providing what opportunities are you making what opportunities are making available for women to better themselves and become economically independent what are you doing south africa it’s time to stop talking and start doing something tangible to save women’s lives what are you doing i’m challenging you do not let nothing die in vain i thank you thank you very much dr spokazzi now that the deputy chairperson of council have said it andy to kill indeed number two and i thought of things in the middle of the program after saying i’m not going to talk i’m not going to call upon the deputy mayor of buffalo city metropolitan municipality councillor helen now may to come and address us welcome program director let me greet the mother and father of nasi saylor and tameni the entire tabeini family relatives and friends deputy minister of higher education science and innovation embassy of sport recreation art and culture our mayor of matatia the vice chancellor and leadership from the university of fort hair leadership of government and the alliance religious leaders present non-governmental organizations present students from the university of fort hair and members of the community ladies and gentlemen we are gathered here today under very difficult circumstances for our metro our province and our nation we are meeting here as a result of an extremely understandable situation about a week ago a young nocitrella was murdered by her boyfriend a person that she was supposedly close to and in a romantic relationship with no women in this country knows that the person who comes to them seeking a relationship is the person that will end their life in such a horrific manner for sure the friends and classmates of nosikrela never thought that her life would end in such a brutal manner and that being in a relationship would result in such a sad ending of a purposeful life and in the hands of a man i’m sure many would agree that the killing of noctella is a sour moment for not only the family but for the entire nation in the months we are celebrating of women’s month we are told that nossitrelo was such an inspiration coming from matatiel to realize her vision to becoming an attorney this shows she was focused and had a vision and worked diligently to get to her final year the act committed by her murderer is unimaginable difficult to describe and difficult to understand this is a shameful gruesome act and i have no words to describe it the environment in our city and country is that of sadness and mourning due to this act of barbarity by men who are dearly supposed to ensure their safety it is high time that we realize that we are facing a deadlier global pandemic the pandemic of femicide perpetrated by men who believe that they have ownership of the woman’s body violence against women is not about women’s behavior but about how men modify women in the memory of nastrela let us find ways of better working together to fight the scrounge of gender-based violence and famicide we should create solid partnerships as government women’s rights organizations universities religious organizations and law enforcement agencies we have already met with the university of fort hair earlier this week in an attempt to find ways of collaboration in fighting the prevalence of gender-based violence in our city and also fighting crime and the proliferation of drugs our municipality is open to suggestions and to collaborative acts that will help reclaim our communities from thugs and perverts this is a fight we cannot afford to lose this year the year of charlotte patrick realizing women’s rights i believe as leaders it is time for transformation as government leaders and civil society we must address issues of gender oppression patriarchy sexism racism and structural oppression directly if we want to create a conducive environment that enables women to take control of their lives as well as ensuring their safety and protection on behalf of our city we want to send our condolences to the family of nazi sailor and relatives mr and mrs tabani we feel your pain and we want to assure you and your daughter you will always be in our thoughts and prayers we will do everything in our power to ensure that women do not live in fear as is the case today enough is enough i thank you thank you very much our deputy mayor i’m just going to shift the program i’m going to ask the deputy minister for higher education science and innovation mr bhuti manamela to come and address us welcoming thank you program director let me extend our deepest condolences to the family and friends of nocitelo especially her father colisela and her mother and tom bizandile on behalf of our ministry the minister and also on behalf of our government we really want to send this heartfelt condolences to you and we also want to say to you that this is also a loss and i think many of the speakers have reflected on how we’ve been robbed of a future star of this nation now and then the national anger is aroused when attention is brought to the gruesome violence and killing and rape targeted at women the program director made a remark about how in the streets of social media the answer is well the question is usually asked what did she do to deserve this and when this national anger is aroused we all gather in august and collectively join in mourning and condemnation of the perpetrators of such violence foul and act or rather of the victims of such violent acts and yet we conveniently forget that collectively as a society especially we as men are culpable to this atrocious crime the list of women especially students who have lost their lives to the barbarism of men goes on we remember zolila kumalo of mangosutri university was brutally made as murdered by the boy by her boyfriend in may 2018 we also remember paralysal madiba of the university of johannesburg just the house of cput precious ramabulan of capricorn tibet colleges and yet the question was asked even then what is it that they’ve done to deserve this and the only common factor between all of this that they are women and those who are killed because of their gender or sexual orientation or sexual preference are precisely killed because they have a vagina and some of those who are killed because they are gay are killed because they behave like those who have a vagina and some of those who are killed because of corrective rape because they are women or lesbian are killed precisely because they sleep with people who have a vagina in many cultures as going through most of this that families and tribes born because women gave birth to a girl because the preference is that we should have a boy and these are some of the cultures that have been built into our system that reinforces patriarchy that reinforces male domination that reinforces the fact that the male or the man remains superior than all other genders and that anybody else who have a different genital is therefore less of a human being and this is why we are where we are today and today as a nation we’re grappling with this blood cuddling detail of the matter of yet another young woman and while we’re still processing the news of the death of many women and i must say that yes collectively we mourn because some say it happened during national women’s month but the question that should go deeper into our concerns is are we only mourning collectively this death because it happens on national women’s month because of the gruesomeness of the nature of the death and yet we keep quiet when some of these things are happening behind closed doors when we as neighbors [Music] as street mates as fellow students as fellow workers as we go into sha beans and everywhere else in social spaces some of this acts happens on a daily basis and yet we keep quiet and only choose to speak out because this was gruesome i wouldn’t have done that i wouldn’t have killed my girlfriend because she cheated on me i wouldn’t have spent the night with her dead body i wouldn’t have gone the following day to go and do some of the things that we’ve had as based on the police account that we want to dissociate ourselves from those acts precisely because we believe that we’re more human and more men and that our exploitation and abuse and neglect and avoiding the fact that women are killed that we as a society collectively and particularly we as men are contributing towards the systemic violence that is targeted against women precisely because they were born with the wrong genitals and we believe that we’re entitled to that so the story of nocitello is part of the broader story of women in our country who today have to live with the reality that they can be attacked raped and murdered anywhere and any and at any time of the day and this story and many others reminded me of the words of sierra waters in a book titled debbie when she wrote in a quote today i wore a pair of faded old jeans and i play gray baggy shirt i hadn’t even taken a shower and i did not put on an ounce of makeup i grabbed a one out black oversized jacket to cover myself with even though it is warm outside i’ve been conscious or i’ve made a conscious decision want to disappear close silence i want to disappear we rob them of their agency of their freedom of the daily reality of women in south africa and we as men do not know what it means to exist in the body of a woman in south africa and in particular the body of a black woman and so like sierra waters many women feel that they want to disappear and that’s the only way within which they can survive and they will not be killed they will not be chopped up and be left on the corner street of some suburb in iceland or anywhere else in the country like many other stories of violence against women by men the story of nosytalo forces us to ask ourselves serious questions about the type of society we are where we make women feel that they should shrink themselves to the point of disappearance just so that they do not die just so that they are not raped just so that they are not killed but most importantly it forces us as men to ask ourselves even deeper and harder questions why is it we have become the rapist and matters of women in our society for those who remain alive remain targets for their survival they just want to disappear and once they are killed we ask the question what do they do to deserve it it’s the heart of this at the heart of these questions are other more fundamental questions are we saying it is okay for young girls and women in south africa are we saying that it is fine for us to just wait for moments like this to express our collective outrage and thereafter go on with our lives she lived in a community she lived in a block of flats there should have been neighbors there should have been someone who had something that was old did we just keep quiet and say it is a private matter do we just let it go and say that it is none of our business did we just say that it is across the whole the wall and therefore we should not interfere and we need to be asking ourselves this deeper question yes the community upon learning of how of all of this informed the police which is what we need to see happening in order for government to be able to do its part to end this atrocious murder and killing of women but importantly collaboration between communities and the police is going to be very very crucial as institutions of high learning we’re part of the broader society and that which happens out there is all that which happens in our institution is but a reflection of what happens out there and violence is going to be the order of the day if we do not deal with it everywhere else outside of our institutions of learning and that students or young people in general mimic those things that they see out there that young men and their attitude and their behavior is reinforced firstly by what they see at home what they hear amongst their friends and sometimes in fact in most instances what gets reinforced by cultures and traditions some of them would really need to take a look at and i think that this is probably that wake-up call for us to ask ourselves these questions are some of the things which we continue to do which places which place young men and men in general in this at this level in society of superiority precisely because of the culture of patriarchy to some of those cultures are they relevant should we not be asking ourselves whether those cultural practices should continue as they are i mean the most basic of those is the exchange of dowry and whatever its origin in our cultures is to certain extent it has now meant that some men believe that precisely because they’ve paid for ebola for this woman therefore they are entitled to do anything and everything with this woman including if needs be and if they believe that they are justified to take their lives yes we’ve done a lot more as government and i’ve had you a deputy chair of council we’ve done more as government in order to ensure that we zoom in on the question of gender-based violence including introducing national skills i mean a national strategic plan investing resources establishing regional costs which are specifically targeted at sexual offenses with reviewed legislation in this regard to ensure that harsher sentences are directed to those who commit sexual offenses but it is not enough or it is not only about setting up these institutions it is about challenging the behavior which has become accepted it is about ensuring that we collectively as a society systematically deal with the problem of patriarchy for instance that we systematically deal with the whole issue of gender-based violence and that we begin to deconscientize particularly men in our society and deal with all of these issues around entitlement and all of that which are as a result or which as a result leads to the killing of women in our society in a conclusion i know profs asked me if i can only i can speak for uh 10 minutes yes i can even lesser but in conclusion prof we really want to applaud what the university has done firstly in giving the necessary support to the family and secondly the kind of responses to the public that we’ve given we understand that you’ve been under treme
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Memorial service for Nosicelo Mtebeni

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